What a bust…!

To fill you in, some time ago I embarked on a diet to see if I could improve my climbing a bit (I'm talking about cycling here) and today is a little over six weeks from the time I began.

Did it work? Well… it might have helped a little but it also reduced the fun factor in my life quite a bit. Like I said in my original post, there is nothing like trying to eliminate something from your life to make you want it liken ever before. When it comes to food that is. In my case I cut out alcohol and 'extraneous' sugar meaning deserts and the like.

And of course as luck would have it (not), as soon as I decided to do this we were invited out for drinks several times and went to a free dinner with unlimited wine, etc., etc. Sigh.

The whole point was to try and lose a few pounds for this hilly race I did last Sunday. When I started I lost four or five pounds right away and then leveled off. After a few weeks I gained back a couple of pounds because I think I started eating larger portions to compensate for not having the stuff I was craving. Then I leveled off again so the net result was I only lost about three pounds.

That's not a big amount of gain for a comparatively large amount of anguish and conscious self-control. What did Martin learn? Totally cutting out something is not that hard but the benefit and reward is also not so great. Portion control on the other hand is obviously the key to more significant gains (or loses in this case) and MUCH harder to enforce.

Major revelation, eh? I know, I know… it just takes me longer than most to figure these things out. :(

Pretty much anything that's smooth Martin loves to shove in his mouth.

I like soft desserts, pudding, ice cream, yogurt, whipped cream, parfaits, custard, eggnog, you get the picture. So it's no wonder that I like smoothies. And no, they are not just for breakfast. Any time I want to chug as many calories as will sustain a third world family for an entire week in a single sitting, I just pull out my blender and go to town.

ASIDE - what a freakin' cash cow industry, eh? Put a lot of shit in a blender, serve it up in a huge cup, make people pay more for some ground up flax seed or a crushed multi-vitamin and laugh all the way to the bank. I should buy some stock… Did I mention covering the cup in labels like "Natural" (what the hell does that really mean anyway?) and "Pure" (does pure heinousness count?) and people flock to your counter.

Smoothies are a breakfast staple of mine at home and I have been asked on occasion what the heck I put in them (and then ridiculed based on my answer by my wife and son) so here goes. Submitted for your approval - not that it matters - this is what Martin blends on a regular basis.

• Two or three pieces of fruit, two of which are usually bananas. Yes, I do remove the seeds if I use an apple or pear, etc. Sheesh…
• One multi-vitamin. Sometimes. I'm not a slave to dietary supplements by any means.
• One scoop of soy protein powder (usually from Trader Joe's 'cuz it's stupid cheap there) as my diet is normally about 90 percent carbs. :( That's about 12 grams of protein to you and me.
• Plain, non-fat yogurt for thickening.
• Non-fat milk for thinning. I know, don't say it. And besides, no liquid at all would not a smoothie make. More of a roughie I guess. Dryie? Scratchie?
• A handful of peanuts. Gotta have 'em.
• Two tablespoons of peanut butter. If some peanuts are good, more are better, right? Besides, these two ingredients have a different texture. The nuts provide a crunchy texture and the butter provides the flavor.
• Some kind of grain like oatmeal or maybe granola or some uncooked hot cereal for extra body, calories and that stick-to-your-ribs substance. This is the part that grosses out most people, "You put that uncooked 7-grain cereal in your smoothie?!" Yes I do. My body is my temple and I will desecrate it how I please.
• Frozen berries. This is my latest addition and I LOVE it. It adds some sweetness without a ton of sugar and a huge amount of flavor. I usually buy these at Trader Joe's too as they are quite pricy at QFC, etc. unless they are on sale.

I set the blender to pulse and away I go. Nirvana in a 32-36 (or is it 40?) oz serving.

Any guesses on how many calories this monstrosity contains? I have no idea and have never bothered to add it all up. I do know that if I drink this I have to wait a solid three hours before I go on a hard ride and more if the exercise is going to involve any kind of jumping or impact like running. Maybe I should get a clue.

Or I can just continue to enjoy my blended breakfast. And I do; probably 2-3 times per week.

Wow... Shelley and her friend Kari were hanging out today and you the know the expression, idle hands and all that. So they went to the store and made some Guinness cupcakes:

Yes, it contains real Guinness beer! And the cheesecake frosting? Need you really ask?

This was just a hurried photo taken with my phone, getting my camera and posing the cupcake would have meant too much waiting around and I needed to shove this into my mouth pronto. God was it good. It had a dense flavor and cohesive quality that all those 'pudding in the mix' cupcakes and brownies just can't match. Made from scratch and to die for.

I made the mistake of walking upstairs and seeing that there were about 15 more on the cooling rack. Give me strength!